Season 14, Episode 8: Trapeze Porn

Episode 8: Trapeze Porn

Returning from the circus managers’ conference, Reggie Bunkler found himself locked out of his office. Truck explained that he’d changed the locks now that it was HIS office, but let Reggie in as a visitor. Reggie asked what had happened while Truck was in charge, and Truck reported that two people had died and Viktor Busliftor had given himself a sex-change operation.

On an ice-cream date with Deb Henderson, Stoolts informed her that he had taken an on-line real estate course so he could support her even if they left the circus…and he’d also taken on-line self-defense classes to protect her from Truck. As they planned their future, Deb suggested that Stoolts also get an on-line GED, seeing as how he was only 15 and had spent his entire life in the circus. Stoolts took offense, thinking she was suggesting he wasn’t smart enough for her.

Robbie ‘Bad Decisions’ Knisions was crying over the death of his biological father (Jack Lightning Jr.) when Gunther Gayfer-Wilhelm came in to console him. Gunther suggested that perhaps Jack wasn’t really dead, and might come back from the grave. Robbie was not comforted.

Viktor (or “Viktoria”) came to Sasha’s trailer for some beauty tips, explaining that he was now a woman. Sasha warned her that there was only room for one beautiful woman in this circus. Viktoria replied that she knew she could never compete with Sasha, but only wanted to feel better about herself. Sasha suggested that Viktoria start by shaving her mustache.

Stoolts confronted Truck, who threatened to knock Stoolts’ wooden stool-legs out from under him. In turn, Stoolts warned that he would rub his wooden legs together really fast and set Truck on fire. Unexpectedly, Truck apologized, explaining that he’d grown sick of violence. He wanted to make it up to Stoolts…perhaps by helping him pass the GED.

Reggie asked Robbie to help him get past Truck’s security system so he could reclaim his own office. Despite his dislike of Reggie, Robbie agreed out of respect for Reggie’s father. This prompted Reggie to reveal that he resented his father because the family circus robbed him of a normal childhood. After a bit more conversation, Robbie noticed the bulge under Reggie’s shirt. Reggie revealed that the baby that had been growing out of his chest had almost fully emerged. Reggie warned that the “baby” whispered to him in the night.

Meeting in the center ring, Deb asked Sasha for advice on her relationship with Stoolts, since she was worried about his drinking and their age difference—she’s 40 and he’s 15. (“If we weren’t in the circus, it’d be illegal.”) Sasha asked if they had actually had sex yet, and Deb replied that they hadn’t yet figured out the logistics of it. Sasha offered to let Deb use her trapeze system to fly onto Stoolts’ weiner.

Gunther ran into Viktoria, and complimented her on her new look. Gunther revealed that, now that Viktoria was a woman, he could admit his attraction to her. Viktoria thanked Gunther for the compliment, but explained that she wasn’t a lesbian. (Viktor had always thought that the long-haired Gunther was a woman.) After clearing up Viktoria’s confusion, Gunther asked her out on a date.

Reggie and Robbie broke into Reggie’s office, where Reggie revealed his plan to somehow get rid of the baby-thing growing from him. Outraged, Robbie informed Reggie that he would care for the baby if Robbie wouldn’t. Then he started breast-feeding it, much to Reggie’s disgust. (“Oh God, I can taste it!”)

Truck was helping Stoolts prepare for the GED, but the questions he asked were deliberately designed to prey on Stoolts’ insecurities. (“If a train is going West at 70 miles per hour, how far away will a man’s girlfriend go to cheat on him because he’s too dumb for her?”) Stoolts started to confront Truck about his insinuations, but then went off on a tangent about The Cosby Show.

Sasha was instructing Deb on how to use the aerial system, telling her to dismount the trapeze and immediately mount Stoolts—which would require both precision timing and great control of her “kenkel” muscles. Sasha then informed Deb that they were going to make their consummation into the circus’ main attraction of the night.

Reggie went to Truck for help in getting rid of the baby-thing. As Truck examined Reggie’s conjoined symbiote, the baby-thing intoned that Truck would die a fiery death. Truck contemplated the financial potential of a baby that could foresee the future, then resumed his examination. Truck informed Reggie that the only tool that could detach the parasite was Truck’s trusty wrench. (“I’m gonna beat you in the face until that baby falls off.”)

Sasha informed Stoolts that she’d prepared a wonderful new act for him and Deb…but first, she’d need to cut a hole in his pants. She then explained the facts of life and “special hugging” to him.

Robbie gave Deb a pep talk to prepare her for the big moment, but grossed her out when he compared it to a ring-toss.

Gunther and Viktoria were out on the town, taking a walk through downtown Atlanta. As traffic passed around them, Viktoria contemplated how romantic it would be to die like Margaret Mitchell. Viktoria then confessed that, for all the wild sexual shenanigans that go on at the circus, she was still a virgin. As “Time After Time” swelled in the background, Viktoria explained that she wanted her first time to be special…but not so special that she’d mistake it for true love. Gunther agreed to take her behind a dumpster.

In Reggie’s office, Truck prepared to remove the baby-thing…by hitting Reggie in the crotch with the wrench.

The time of the big show had arrived, with Deb in the trapeze and Stoolts in the center ring, as the ringmaster announced “The Greatest Statutory Rape on Earth.” After some spectacular aerial maneuvers, Deb swung onto Stoolts and held onto him. Immediately afterwards, Stoolts realized that, during the act, he’d been so excited that he rubbed his wooden legs together too fast…he’d accidentally set fire to himself!

TO BE CONTINUED…